I tried to be perfect but that wasn’t enough for you.
I silenced my voice when I was too loud for you.
I brought down my walls when I wasn’t safe with you.
I gave up my dreams to live your reality.
I tried to absolve you, but that wasn’t enough for me.
“I Wasn’t Enough for You” by Azul Serena
I could lie and say that my favorite color’s blue,
But I’d miss the opportunity to tell you a secret:
My favorite color is the crystal blue that kisses the horizon
Just above the darkened treetop greens that glisten
In the silver-ivory of the glowing moon
On somnolent nights that are heavy
With the weight of cloudless summers
And your sleepy eyelids droop
Under the weight of pointy blue-steel lashes
That adorn the chestnut highlights in your irises
When the sun hits your eyes just so
And the rosy mauve of your cupid’s bow
Breaks into a teasing smile that saturates
My being with its speckled amber honey
Like the burnt chocolate reds weaving through
My curls that drown the ridges of your fingertips
In waves of crystal blue sensations.
“Colors” by Azul Serena
I worry that the girl with the pretty hair and stylish coat
Is the reason you have gained those extra pounds
That you hid so well last month but are now peeking through your shirt.
I worry that her chuckle has become the lantern in your darkness
And my dimples have become a spot in your fading memory.
I worry that this sinking feeling in my stomach
And the sudden rush of heat racing through my veins
Will turn my heart into a frigid stone incapable of love.
I worry that my destructive love will tip the delicate balance of our ‘us’
Like the raindrop that bends the unyielding leaf and spills the brimming glass.
I worry that I lack the courage to tell you that I love you
And that the intensity of my emotions will be the force that pushes me away.
I worry that I’ve waited too long to tell you how I feel.
“I Worry” by Azul Serena
It terrifies me to know that I am capable of love
That destroys ardently and selfishly
That sees blindly and listens deafly
That grips violently and mercilessly
That’s unlike the tender love I give a babe
Newly born into this world
Whose fragile fists clench you
Like the wispiness of a bygone dream
That tears through the septic silence of the night
With a broken shrill and sigh
Like your whisper against my ear
As we curl around each other
Seeking our bodies’ warmth and humming hearts
Those beating drums that dictate
The ebb and flow of our senses
“Terrifying Love” by Azul Serena